Pirates: Totalus Rankium

Lighthearted history podcast ranking all of the Golden Age Pirates. Brought to you by the same people who created Roman Emperors Totalus Rankium and American President Totalus Rankium

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Episodes

34 minutes ago

Last time we covered the life of Blackbeard before he was famous. This time? Well, it's time to understand why he is the most famous pirate of all time!

13.1 Edward Blackbeard Teach

Wednesday Jun 25, 2025

Wednesday Jun 25, 2025

It's the big one! Or at least the first half of the big one! Find out just why Blackbeard is the only pirate Jamie has heard of. We cover his early career under the notorious Captain Hornigold!

12 John Martel

Wednesday Jun 11, 2025

Wednesday Jun 11, 2025

We are still in the Golden age! So does that mean more Sam Bellamy level antics? ... well, no. But we cover the history of Nassau. so that's good. 

11 Black Sam Bellamy

Thursday May 29, 2025

Thursday May 29, 2025

Oh, we have hit the Golden Golden age now! This is what we signed up for. Black Flags, Skull and cross bones, parrots! Levels of nudity that would ensure HBO would have to make the TV version! Black Sam has it all. 

10.5 Woods Rogers

Wednesday May 14, 2025

Wednesday May 14, 2025

This week we go off script. We are not coving a pirate from the General History - but instead we are coving a man who will be popping up a lot in the future: None other than the pirate hunter Woods Rogers! And we try and answer the simple question: Woods Rogers?

10 Nathaniel North

Wednesday Apr 30, 2025

Wednesday Apr 30, 2025

We come to the end of the Pirate Round. North is perfect as he Forrest Gumps his way around the Indian Ocean. Let's do one last round before the Golden Age really begins!

09 David Williams

Wednesday Apr 16, 2025

Wednesday Apr 16, 2025

What happens when a Welsh farm boy is abandoned naked on the shore of Madagascar? Probably piratey shenanigans! Probably.  

08 Samuel Burgess

Wednesday Apr 02, 2025

Wednesday Apr 02, 2025

After having the good man of piracy with Halesy last time, we now go to the bad man of piracy. Was he a pirate? Was he a slaver? Find out!

07 John Halsey

Wednesday Mar 19, 2025

Wednesday Mar 19, 2025

Who is John Halsey? Is he the nice man of piracy? Does he have a plan? Where did all the dragons come from? Find out in this episode!

06 Thomas White

Wednesday Mar 05, 2025

Wednesday Mar 05, 2025

What to do with a pirate we are not 100% sure was real? Cover him anyway and hope for the best! Check out Bluesky and facebook to see the images connected to this episode. https://bsky.app/profile/totalusrankium.bsky.social/post/3ljl7gf5k2c24
https://bsky.app/profile/totalusrankium.bsky.social/post/3ljl7iflrb224
 

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